Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
Dear God. I kissed a man tonight who was born in 1936.
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
Randomize
