fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
Stuck behind a lady in her 70's purchasing a plastic handle of vodka and nothing else. She is writing a check. Hello future.
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
Im about to embark on a date with someone who shit in my car. How did this become my life?
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
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