If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
Randomize