you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
you know what would be perfect? if you flew in on a horse/cat holding taco bell and then you swooped me up and took me to disney world and it was magical
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
Randomize
