I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
Never go to your parents' super bowl party. I learned, in great detail, "Why Aunt Trisha is a hoe" Not enough beer on the eastern seaboard.
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
Randomize
