Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
I think I just got drunk texted by my psychiatrist
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
Randomize
