Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
Dude, you screamed I AM THE WALRUS while giving a statue of Ronald McCdonald a lapdance. You were NOT sober.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
