Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
So this was during drunk golfing. She started wacking me off on the ninth hole and an old couple rolls up next to us. And Says "hey gu- oh my golly" and while my penis is in her hand I'm like "sorry you guys can play through"
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
Will you be doing the frenzied booty dance of passionate ownage on my penis tonight
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
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