At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
my being single is dangerous.
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
I can't even be mad at customs in houstons airport anymore for missing my flight and having to stay overnight. Within an hour of meeting we did it at her place. Her last word being "glad I could show you real southern hospitality". I'm definitely coming back here someday
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
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