youre lurking in front of me
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
I appreciate the fact that you sent me a snapchat of your dick soaking in a cup of water.
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
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