Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
Do you remember me making bird noises at the bartender with some guy at the bar last night?
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
I threw a dessert topping at a baby tonight so drink up! If you stay sober tonight I will be very disappointed in you.
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
Help. Why am I so naked?
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