lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
Girls are like M&M's, once the lights go out you can't tell the difference.
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
my roommate made out with a guy wearing a squirrel costume, equipped with a blow up tail. time to start harvesting nuts for the winter
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
Do you have any puffy paint? I want to put "fiesta muthafuckas" on my sombrero but its too much to bedazzle.
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
God knew I'd have horrible taste in men, so made me asexual to ensure I'd never fuck them.
Randomize
