I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
Ok I'm drunk as fuck already at 529 and this waitress started flirting with me, I wanna bang her for acknowledging my existence
My neighbor is burning all of her ex's things in a metal drum outside the window. Guess who's going to make a new friend?
In retrospect, vomiting out of a moving vehicle on the third date should have been a deal breaker
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
I mean, I'm not hammered, but I definitely can't show my face or tits in that bowling alley again
Randomize
