I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
I was wondering if I fell or perhaps got hit by a truck, then I remembered, it's cause I did a splits contest at the bar
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
We were walking up the stairs and I asked Dominick what floor the party was on. The cop who had just tried breaking it up was walking down the stairs, drinking a slurpee, and answered, "Third floor."
I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself?
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
It gives me purpose in life to help fulfill nerdy fantasies. Like I'm doing something good for mankind and having multiple orgasms in the process.
Some guy just ordered at Cosmo and 2 screwdrivers in the sky club at 8:30 am. I'm starting to feel a lot better about my alcoholism
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
Randomize