he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
I'm pretty sure I have jizz on the back of the dress I wore to church. Awesome.
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
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