and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
Dude, hurry and get over. I need a wingman. She is on her 6th vodka shot and her resident ugly friend is still sober
You know how my eyes change color? Well I noticed after I hook up with someone my eyes are greener.
Wow, so you're like the Edward Cullen of sluts.
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
masturbating is 5million times harder to finish knowing grandma is in the guestroom downstairs. just so you know.
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
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