So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
she was stuffing dove chocolates in my mouth while giving me a blow job. GOD I LOVE VALENTINES DAY
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
You okay?
I walked into work with a banana and a loaf of bread
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
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