But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
if masturbating while stoned isn't called "weed whacking" then i just don't know how to live my life anymore
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
In your alcohol circus, can my act be juggling men? Let's be real, I can juggle multiple dick buddies better than a professional
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
Did I literally just offer a blowjob for help moving? Yes. Yes, I did.
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