did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
Where did you get a picture of my penis
I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
i asked why he had a giant piece of popcorn duct taped to his head and he said "No, it's actually part of my neck." so no, i didn't fuck him.
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
She came to the party dressed as slutty elmo and then called me oscar the grouch for not wanting to bang her in the dumpster outside.
she is way to in-touch with her childhood
Why the fuck did I wake up in a chair with mouth clamps?!
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
Randomize
