White coat. Heels.
do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
He kept buying me shots of tequila. I decided to just save myself the half hour of toilet hugging and tell him straight up that I intended on sleeping with him. We got Tacos on the way home with all the money we saved.
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
I ate pizza in bed, sans pants, and then carved a pumpkin. FUNCTIONING ADULT MOTHERFUCKERS!
I'm eating lunchables with a glass of wine while I FaceTime the guy I lost my virginity to.
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
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