Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
He made me chicken tenders and margaritas in preparation for me to take a pregnancy test at his place later tonight. Like...seriously.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
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