yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
Julian told me all the fish in his pond died and he didn't know when or how. I didn't have the heart to tell him he drunkenly peed in the pond on Saturday as everyone cheered him on.
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
Either I'm too drunk or she gave me a hand job to the rhythm of jingle bells.
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
Was expecting a sext from Kristi and then my mom randomly sent me a pic of her ugly Xmas sweater. Worst. Buzzkill. Ever.
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
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