You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
I kinda knew it wasnt going to pan out when he would rather watch how i met your mother ON TIVO than fuck me......
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
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