where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
Had to have a serious talk with my liver and remind it that it is my birthday weekend and there are three more nights like last night ahead of us
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
Randomize