I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
And don't try to lose a condom in me tonight. My vagina is not a storage compartment where you can just leave something and try and use it again later in the week.
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
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