Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
This is how we made chicken soup last night: Whole chicken in a pot of vodka with a box of crackers and some carrots. We should go pro.
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
My day in three words: secret purse cake
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
I accidentally sent my dad a very explicit Star Wars fanfiction and he replied with "That was great!"
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
Randomize
