well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
im just glad that if you were going to have awkward hospital sex, you would want it with me
I awoke this morning to a naked boyfriend flying a remote controlled shark around his apartment. This is my life.
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
The batteries in my vibrator died before I could finish. Which is a lot like my sex life lately......
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
Randomize