My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
he asked me to put his condom on because he couldn't see without his glasses
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
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