And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
I'm still in my ugly sweater and underwear drinking coffee next to a plate of assorted treats we stole from the party. I got a new sweater by the way, its shoulderpad-y and looks like a news anchor got thrown up on by Liberace. I'm pretty proud.
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
Randomize