I've slept with so many tools that you'd think my pussy was Home Depot.
Thank you for holding my vodka while the police let me ride their horse.
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
I just headbutted my cat because he was trying to eat my bacon.
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
I'm hungover and surrounded by children and Republicans. What did I do to deserve this?
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
I would fuck him just for his dog
not only did u rap a voicemail to me last night.... but it lasted so long that it cut you off so you called back to finish..... never do this again
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
