Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
Randomize
