We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
You love me.
That's because, tragically, I adore whores.
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
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