Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
I wanted to take a shower but I forgot we made applesauce in it last night.
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
So yeah, don't be alarmed when you come home after work to find me eating cookie dough out of a margarita glass with a knife and watching The Little Mermaid. It's been one of those days.
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
Randomize
