Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
Randomize
