ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
You smell like stripper and shame
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
So awkward... The newspaper lady just caught me sitting stoned in my driveway at 5 am and asked if I was okay. I'm way better than ok right now
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
apparently I crawled into someone's bed and demanded they call me 'big dog' before shotgunning a beer
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
Randomize
