Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
Ok in all seriousness. Alcohol intake is now restricted for me. I found handcuffs in my trunk.
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
Don't get into any trouble on your trip
The only foreseeable trouble would be pregnancy, but I gotta be sterile otherwise I'm beating some pretty fucking incredible odds
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
Randomize