I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
Successfully pulled the houdini tonight. Check that off my list.
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
Last night the nurse at the ER told me that she wished all her drunk patients were like me. Then she commented on my socks...
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
Fucking someone because they own a lava lamp is like fucking someone because they have 20 dollars and no concern for their house burning down.
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
Randomize
