do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
I need a hoe opinion
go on
Randomize
