i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
The woman at the nail salon waxing my lip just showed me the strip with all the hair on it while smirking. Apparenltly 'you have a stache' can be communicated through a language barrier.
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
The one time I decide to bring people over you are laying naked on the coffee table watching the ceiling fan cause "it just moves so fast" I'm guessing you got paid today??
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
Randomize
