Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
Just got hit on by a middle-aged puerto-rican clown who told me that it would be bad to date someone who offers to buy me coffee and makes something of themselves. I love the NY subway.
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
It's 5AM and I just stirred weed butter into ramen noodles. This is not where I expected to be at 30. ...But, hey, getting high off noodles.
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
i just has to use a gift card to Target that one of my students parents got me to buy Plan B bc my bank account is -$0.08 so my 2017 is starting exactly how i pictured.
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
Randomize
