I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
Hey guys. This is Daniel texting on mayas phone. if she called you and told you that i made her have sex with me in my doghouse with my dog present that wasn't true.... so dont spread that.
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
I was cleaning up my drunken mess and I found my ID in a cereal box
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
I think it was our ex-neighbor Mike. He leaves Taco Bell outside our door a lot
He'll drop off his extra tacos at our place bc he's super high when he orders & can't eat them all
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
I went home with a guy last night because he showed me some magic tricks and kept shouting "THEY'RE ILLUSIONS MICHAEL!"
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
Just so you know the unusual amount of skittles on your floor is entirely your own fault. You bought me 20 bags of them while I was high.
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
Randomize
