batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
Tom just texted me he's Tindering from his hospital bed while they're running heart tests on him.
That's dedication to the game.
I'm very impressed by your ability to explain a story about your fiery snatch solely in emojis. props.
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
Randomize
