I just watched a girl at work pick her nose with 4 of her 5 fingers. So I now know what sausage biscuits taste like in vomit form.
I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
My penis has a 100% approval rating. He has never received a formal complaint. If you'd like to file one, you can go fuck yourself.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
Randomize
