Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
She went to the bathroom before i broke up with her so i changed all 2500 of her songs on her computer to "I'm a cheating whore"
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
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