Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
Molly wanted me to tell you, "she hasnt shit on the floor in a while" like she thinks its an accomplishment.
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
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