We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
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