Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
I can tuck mytits in my pants
if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
He just walked up to me in the kitchen, pulled out his penis and stuck it in my sweatpants pocket.
It was probably cold. Sweatpants pockets are notoriously warm.
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
I currently don't understand fingers.
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