in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
Well if you don't want to be kicked out before last call don't I would suggest stop drinking whiskey and don't call the giant bouncer with the neck tattoo "princess"
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
Disregard everything I texted you last night. Oh, and disregard me hooking up with your boyfriend.
She can't take shots?!? Literally if I could list that as a skill on a resume I would
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