I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
somebody snuck up and got me drunk
she said i have a nice penis, i told her only bob saget and god could judge that.
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
His phone started ringing when we were pulled over and he said 'hold on, this is most likely more important than you', proceeded to answer it and agree to work sunday, then hung up, looked at the cop and told him to continue.
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
Randomize