that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
Fuckin' raining men in my bedroom while I'm trying to drunk eat a rather large portion of pasta. Like shoo I already picked who I'm sleeping with. Pasta wins.
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
I duct taped a bottle of vodka to the back of your closet while you were sleeping in case of emergencies. Go rip it off, it's going to be a long night.
Randomize
