just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
A hangover is a type of food poisoning. Makes me feel better about calling out of work.
There's puke on my pillow. I'm still wearing my wedges. And I have a cab drivers number clutched in my fist.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
Is it weird that my ex and the dude I'm talking to now both only have one testicle? Apparently I've found my type..
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
Randomize
