I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
We just shotgunned beers for America
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
Randomize
